Students Of Success

If I asked you what your greatest gift is, some of you would answer very quickly: your spouse, your children, your successful career, winning a gold medal, or maybe when you won the lottery. Others of you might take a moment to decide which gift is the greatest. While you might agree with one of the above gifts, you could mention a situation in which you saved another’s life, the experience of overcoming an illness, escaping from near fatal harm and so on.

Every one of these are fabulous gifts, a gift that can keep on giving for a lifetime. In fact, if you became introspective a moment or two, you’ll probably think of another, then another, and yet another gift, for every life is truly blessed with a continual parade of gifts.

No matter what you believe is your greatest gift, I am asking you to put it aside to make room for the most important, most spectacular, most unique, most magnificent, most beautiful gift you’ll ever have -YOU!

That’s right, you are your greatest gift. Without you there could be no spouse, no children, no career, no medal, no escape from harm. You see, you are the center of your universe just as each of us are. Because of you there can be a knowing of the gifts; it happens within you.

So let’s talk about you, the Gift. You are created by the Creator of the universe and are part of your Creator as is every other created being. You are unique, a one-of-a-kind design. You are blessed with many abilities and an inner beauty that wants to be revealed. You are made from the energy of love so that you can spread love. You have natural intuition and a divine connection. You are part of the abundant universe and have unlimited power available to you simply by aligning with your Creator. As the sky is endless, so are your possibilities. You came to live in this life experience so you can expand into higher awareness and learn much. You are so special because you have something special within you to share with the world. So is there a gift greater than this?

It is time for you to acknowledge your worth, to know your value and recognize your greatness. So often an individual has been conditioned to believe their value is governed by their production level and whether or not they measure up. As a human being it is easy to “fall short of the mark,” and a chain reaction comes into play that says not good enough, failed, messed up, has limits.

Through divine awareness my belief says I’m of worth by just being me and is not measured by anything I do. My understanding says that my Creator (God) is perfect and only creates perfect designs, all from love. As part of my Creator and a perfect design, I can be only of great worth. It has nothing to do with my productivity: I am simply me, God’s perfect love.

You too are a perfect design of God. Do you think God messes up? The very fact that you are breathing the breath of life at this very moment is a gift. The reality that your birthright is the essence of pure love with unlimited power is a marvelous gift. Knowing this reality of your birthright expresses the mindfulness of your absolute value.

As you shift to the realization of your origin from perfect love and accept the birthright of greatness, you can then understand how you are your greatest gift. From this greatness you came into this life experience with your gift within you; it is your responsibility to share it with the world. This gift is yours and yours alone, like no one else’s, not a duplicate anywhere. Now that’s pretty special if you ask me. And to think we each have one (or more) of these special gifts within us.

Have you remembered that special gift of yours? So often it remains hidden from the view of the world and perhaps even from you. But once you uncover this precious gift your entire life will change, and as you share it with others their lives will change. The gift within you becomes you.

But because individuals doubt the endless supply of possibilities as well as their own power, they don’t believe in their true value. Instead, they believe they must earn their worthiness through what they achieve, acquire or do rather than who they are.

You were created from love and are love, and this love is who you are - a great gift to this world. Unwrap the package of you and step into the light so you can shine brilliantly. It’s not what you give nor what you receive, but who you are that is your greatest gift! Thank God every single day for You!

Carolyn Porter, D. Div.
Empower Productions, Inc.
Woodstock, GA 30188
678-445-3309
info@drcarolynporter.com
www.drcarolynporter.com

©2004

Carolyn Porter, D. Div., is an Inspirational Speaker, Author of multiple books and audios, Trainer, Spiritual Wholeness Coach and Energy Facilitator whose passion is to help individuals discoer their own magnificence to that they shine like the star that they are.

1 Samuel 16:7

“…The Lord does not look at the things man looks at. Man looks at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart.”

While I was recently on a technology imposed computer vacation, I evaluated many things about myself. I truly think this is important for every Christian to do often. The world has a tendency to affect every portion of our thoughts and actions if we don’t keep them in check and in line with what the Lord wants for us. One of the things I evaluated was my own character. What exactly is character? Character is defined basically as a destinguishing mark or impression. So if you apply that to yourself, what kind of mark do you leave behind? That my friend is your character.

The greatest understanding of character comes from the bible. The first occurrence I found was in Genesis. The first two humans on earth had only one promise to keep and they messed it up. Not only did they mess up, they lied about it and then blamed each other. Although they failed, Adam and Eve spent the rest of their lives trying to make it up. Character is cumulative. You aren’t born with character, you die with it, it’s something you create over a lifetime of difficult circumstances. All people fall short of the Glory of God and sin. Can you admit that sin? Are you able to accept responsibility for the mistakes that you make or do you place the blame on others? All of these things matter to God; He made that very clear in Genesis and through out the bible.

Our characters as Christians are constantly tested. When Moses led God’s people out of Egypt the Israelites were constantly tested in order to shape their character. The Desert of Sin was an immense and hostile environment. There was no water and no food, and very little faith in the people even though they had witnessed such greatness as the parting of the Red Sea. They told Moses he should have let them suffer in Egypt rather than die slowly in the desert. As always, God provided for their needs in spite of their doubts and grumblings. If you can’t recognize yourself in the Israelites you aren’t looking very deep. How many times does God save us just for us to turn around and complain again?

It is in the testing that our true characters are defined. In 2 Chronicles, Hezekiah was a man that did “what was good and right and faithful before the Lord” during his lifetime he was struck ill and nearly died. This wasn’t punishment, but testing. Sometimes in order for us to see the flaws in our own character, the Lord has to humble even his most faithful servants.

I didn’t really come to any conclusions about my character except to understand that I am still building it. Every day I live is another opportunity to turn to the Lord with complete faith and trust, even when I don’t understand what’s going on. One thing I do know is that when my casket is closed, my character will remain on earth as a testimony to my life, whether good or bad. Then, when I face my Lord at the judgment seat I will not be able to prepare a defense against the people that have hurt me or the injustices that I endured but I will be accountable for every way in which I reacted to them. That’s definitely something to think about.

God Bless and Happy Character Building!

Romans 5:3

We also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom he has given us.

© 2005 SecretAngels.Org

All works submitted under this copyright may be freely distributed to honor and glorify God.

Secret Angels is a non-denominational, private foundation, who’s mission is to uplift all women. Through counseling, mentoring and resources this organization hopes to help women become the wives and mothers that this society is so greatly in need of. Their goal is to provide positive mentoring environments and support networks as well as offering many different types of resources and assistance to aid each individual overcome the burdens and strife of modern day life. Secret Angels believes that through their efforts, women will be better able to raise strong, responsible, self-supporting families and positively effect society with greater self-esteem, confidence and faith in God.

To thrive in the current environment of fast change, aggressive challenges and hard lessons you have to be all that you have within you to be.

To live life to the fullest you have to realise your potential, you have to know how to relate to others effectively and you have to know yourself.

This leads to the question “What is our real self?” What is the real you behind the personality you have developed during your lifetime? You adapt your behaviour to fit your current circumstances - you put on a mask. Be this mask one of cruelty or kindness, happiness or depression, generosity or selfishness it is an illusion. Our masks are often donned for good reason, indeed no-one is denying that their occasional use is appropriate in much the same way as we dress differently when attending a party or a wedding, but they cause stress, unhappiness and discontent when they become stuck.

To be authentic, to achieve a way of being which allows you to be your true self you must learn to live without your mask.

The way to achieve wellness and contentment is to allow the deepest truths within you to come out. You can do this in many ways but finding a place of stillness is a good place to start.

Many claim to have tried meditation and given it up. Meditation is like any skill - it needs daily practice for the benefits to be felt and for mastery to be achieved. The thoughts which interfere with meditation come from consciousness. This does not mean you need to be unconscious to meditate! Rather think of your consciousness as being like a shiny tap. The thoughts flow from your consciousness in much the same way as water flows from the tap. If you choose to turn the tap off, water no longer flows - if you choose to turn off your thoughts your consciousness remains but it is not permitted to interfere with your quietness.

As humans we grow - this is a natural process unless we deliberately limit ourselves in some way. You will know people who appear to be more advanced, more developed or more “together” than you. Such development is available to you if you simply stop selling yourself short and putting things on the too-hard-to-do list.

So often our focus is on acquiring more things to allow us to do what we want to do in the hope that we can be happy, content and fulfilled. Ask yourself, has this strategy worked for you? Have you stretched yourself to unrealistic financial limits in order to acquire more? Do you have debts incurred for articles which you seldom look at or use? Did the acquisition of these things give you the enduring contentment and happiness you sought?

Surely if you turn this process around, if you can be your true self, you will do things which really give you enjoyment and pleasure and then you shall have all you want!

Adapted behaviour or masked behaviour can be maintained for a short time but not without cost. It is a bit like wearing someone else’s shoes. They are fine to nip out to the garage but not to wear all day! To force yourself into being something you are not is to rub yourself sore, just as the shoes will inevitably rub. You become a square peg in a round hole. You begin questioning your purpose. Masked behaviour can even differ between the sexes. How many men do you know who find it difficult to express their hurt so instead demonstrate anger? How many women cannot express their anger so experience hurt instead? What does this concealment of the true way of being cost the individual and their relationships? Can you see how much additional stress we induce by not being authentic?

Real change occurs in our lives when we become what we are, not when we try to become what we are not! Is this a challenge you are ready to embrace?

Donetta Harrison is building http://www.wellnessforlife.info, an information resource on all aspects of wellness in all domains of life, to encourage individuals to take responsibility for their health and wellbeing in order that that they may live life to the full. More Information from wellnessforlife@btinternet.com.

Recently a romantic relationship came to an end and I found myself alone again. The minutes, the hours now felt empty. For three weeks I sat beside a silent phone, rehashing the past and coming to terms with my loss. After the warmth and intimacy of love, my loneliness felt like a great abyss that I could not escape.

I do not allow myself to indulge in self-pity - so my next reaction was to ask “what now?” Looking back, I saw that I had invested so much time and energy in the relationship that I had grown lax about undertaking new projects or meeting new people.

My first step was to join a Friday evening discussion group, which I found very stimulating. I also prepared and delivered two new workshops to help people find their life purpose and make money doing what they loved. In giving these I again recognized what I had to offer the community (encouragement, experience and insight) and was buoyed by the positive response from participants.

Everyone feels lonely sometimes. It’s part of being human! However we cannot afford to become paralyzed by a sense of isolation. We all need to connect - both to ourselves and to the world around us.

What does your loneliness tell you? What is it that you miss? You may believe that a love partner will fulfill all your needs. However the intensity that marks the beginning of a relationship doesn’t last; with luck, it will change into something deeper. The two of you will again be drawn into your individual lives. If you don’t feel connected to what you are doing or to the people around you, you are likely to feel lonely again.

Here are my suggestions for dealing with loneliness:

Get involved with others

Have time on your hands? Offer your services at a soup kitchen, read stories to children, or play cheerful tunes on the piano at the seniors’ residence. What do you know or are good at? Perhaps you can do like me and give a workshop in your area of expertise. There’s no room for loneliness when you give freely of yourself - and you will receive love and appreciation in return.

If you’re a computer buff, there are communities of people on the Net who want to share their interests, from dating to rug hooking. Especially for the housebound, regular e-mail friends can be a great solace.

Do something you love

Limit your television viewing, push yourself off the couch and engage in something that you really enjoy! Maybe you haven’t roller-skated in years and going to the local rink makes you come alive. Bake your favourite pie and share it with a friend, or learn how to do the lambada.

The problem is that many of us don’t ALLOW ourselves to do what we love. We tell ourselves, I’ll do it when… (I meet the love of my life, become more successful, finish all these chores). Do it NOW and you will feel better for it.

Connect with nature

I never feel lonely when I go for a long walk by the river. I have a thing for water: ocean, lake or streams. Feel your connection to nature - whether you plant a row of petunias or take a leisurely walk in the park.

Journal for self-expression

When there’s no one around to talk to, and I feel the need, I journal in a small notebook in longhand, letting deeper thoughts and feelings emerge from my subconscious. I write about my preoccupations as well as my hopes and fears.

You cannot enjoy being alone without peace of mind. Journaling helps you to voice and resolve any inner conflicts that you have. Doing it on a regular basis will give you clarity and focus. It’s a good way to connect with your inner self.

Realize that you are NOT alone

Do you know that most of the world is feeling lonely at this very moment? Think of the new neighbour on your street, a foreign student in your class, or the man who just joined your company. Each of them wonders how he or she will make friends. Be the first to give a warm welcome.

Whatever your faith or beliefs, connecting with a Higher Force through prayer or meditation will also dispel feelings of isolation.

A little too much solitude spurs me to reach out to those around me. On my nature walk yesterday, I met a woman. As we both watched kayakers ride the rapids, we struck up a conversation - ranging from our experience with water sports to where we grew up and what we enjoyed about the waterfront. At the end we both went our separate ways, parting with a smile and a wave. I’ve learned to appreciate the little exchanges that make life so much fuller.

Loneliness makes me feel painfully alive and aware that I cannot afford to get complacent. It compels me to do more, to be more. And that isn’t such a bad thing, is it?

About The Author

Thelma Mariano, life coach and author, is dedicated to bringing clarity and direction to people’s lives. See her on-line coaching prorams, articles and column at http://www.u-unlimited.ca.

thelma@u-unlimited.ca

Astrology is considered to be the oldest of all sciences, which studies the effects of the planetary positions and movements on our lives. Indian Astrology is an integral aspect of the Vedic literature (Vedic Astrology) and was practiced over the years by Indian sages and passed on to their disciples. In olden days, the kings would depend on astrology to determine the right and auspicious time before embarking on any new and important initiatives. Ages later, today, we still find the strong influence of astrology in our day-to-day life. Any major event in life, whether it is marriage, buying a car, buying a house, or even entering a new house, is undertaken only after consulting the astrologer for an auspicious time.

Astrology is in-depth science with multiple widespread branches. It is used to create birth or natal charts (Jathaka / Janampatri) based on the time, date and place of birth, to answer any specific questions ‘Prashnas’, to find the auspicious time and day called ‘Muhurtha’. While all of these aspects of astrology are well in use today, one of the most popular one is the creation of Jathaka’s and matching of Jathaka’s for marriages. Marriage is an important aspect of life. In India, when a child is born, the exact place, date and time is documented and when the child grows older his/her natal chart is created based on this birth data. When the child attains marriageable age, his/her natal chart is matched with those of prospective brides and grooms to find an astrologically compatible match. This is an age-old tradition, which is practiced with equal fervor even in this tech-savvy, net-savvy age.

It is interesting to note that, thousands of years ago astrology was imparted by the teachers to their pupils orally. During the beginning of ‘Kali Yuga’ the astrological literature was documented for the future generation.

Today, the essence of astrology has been captured and converted into astrological software. These software’s are immensely accurate and provide extensive reports based on scientific calculations. One such service is provided on the website www.BridesandGroomsIndia.com, which is an Indian matrimonial site. The Astrology section provides various astrological services like horoscope / natal chart generation, horoscope / natal chart matching for compatibility, star matching for compatibility.

Indian Astrology is an integral part of the Indian culture and most of the marriages are consummated only after consulting an astrologer. At BridesandGroomsIndia.com a genuine effort is made to help prospective couples figure out whether they are compatible to be bound in the holy wedding knot.

The author is a freelance writer based in Pune, India. She has been collecting information on Indian Astrology.

When we first beginning to meditate, there are many
habits that we fall into that prevent us from achieving
a peaceful, state to make any real progress. There
are habits of worry, restlessness, judging
ourselves or our practice of meditation, excessive
movement which can become distracting,
overeating, overindulging in smoking or drinking,
complaining, and finding fault. There also are
certain habits that we can do to assist our mind to
get into a place of meditation, and to begin to
make some progress in your practice. Here are
some hints:

Consistency of Time: It is better to meditate at the
same time every day. It is also usually easier to
meditate early in the morning because the Earth is
more still, your mind is quieter and the day-to-day
activities have not started yet. But if you can’t do it
early in the morning, be consistence with the time that
you meditate during your day, and do this every day
if you are able.

Consistency of Place: It is also beneficial to have the
same place, so that your mind can make recognition
of familiar things that are around and begin to feel
secure there. The mind is like a small child that needs
routine. Chose a certain corner of a room or room of
your house that you will consider your meditation
space. If you cannot leave out your props each day,
collect them and then with each time you can display
and use them in that space once again. Consistency
of time and place assists the mind with that feeling of
safety and security.

Familiar Props: Having the same things that you
use consistently helps greatly in your meditation
process. Again it is a sense of trust, safety and
familiar that aids the mind to become quiet. A
suggestion of some props includes your choice
of prayer cloth, which can be draped over your person.
Drape cloth for an alter that you set up. An alter,
or table that will have all of your meditation items on it,
a bell or chime, or Tibetan bowls to announce the
beginning and end of your meditation, prayer beads
or mala beads, inspirational books, or prayer books,
candle or small light, incense, a mediation pillow,
mat, or roll, special pictures of landscapes or saints or
spiritual leaders, or special items like a feather, or
blessed materials, shells, small stones etc, small
tickless alarm clock.

Creating a Routine of Actions: In creating habits for
meditation, a routine says to your mind that it is time
to meditate and get quiet. The routine might include,
first a preparation of purification. This could include a
bath, or simply washing your face and your hands with
cool water, and then patting your face dry prior to
starting your meditation. Next an acknowledgement
to your higher self, or god, is appropriate. You could
do this by putting your hands together in prayer
position over your heart, which indicates you are
centering your heart, and opening your heart, then lift
your hands to your forehead, to acknowledge your
third eye or center of perception, and then bring your
hands back down to touch your heart. It is an indication
that you are coming back to your center and that is
where you will begin your meditation. It is also an
intention of purification of heart and mind. After
purifying yourself physically and mentally, you might
chose to light an incense, set out your props, and light
a candle. You could ring a chime or a bell and let the
sound resonate in your ears and through your body.
If you enjoy meditation with music it is appropriate to
turn on your music softly prior to your beginning. Next
you may begin your breathing to center your mind, and
cover yourself with your prayer shawl or blanket.

Meditation is the stillness of the mind and a
reconnection with your inner spirit. It could be a
time of reflection, and a period of question and
answers, or simple a time of less thoughts to offer
you peace. Here are some tools to help you get to
that quiet place.

First for the novice, an appropriate duration of time
is 5-10 minutes. Do not overtax yourself when you
first begin. As you progress the duration of time can
increase to 10-30 or 40 minutes, or for an hour or
more. When meditating, we try to shut out the
outside stimulus and force the mind inward.
This is one reason that you try to sit as still
as possible in the session. You are discarding all
physical distraction and sensations. It is important to
sit in the most comfortable position that you are able
so that you will be able to sit still for a period of time.
Prior to beginning your meditation, you could stretch
your neck and move your head up and down and to

either side, stretch your back a little and your shoulders.
When you prepare in this way it is more likely that you
will not be distracted by physical tension.

As you begin to meditate watch and observe your
thoughts without any judgments or condemnation.
When you have observed your thoughts for a while,
begin to call the mind back like a little child. “We are
breathing, we are letting go of these thoughts now.”
Refocus on the breath coming in through your nose again,
if you become disturbed or distracted. If you are fearful be
assured that nothing here can hurt you, this is a discovery
of your inner self and a return to your TRUE nature.
Once you have become accustomed to meditating you
will be more comfortable with your true nature and
realize that you are created to be naturally peaceful, and
joyful, and that is the natural state of your being.

There are different techniques to get you to that silent
and still place. Breathing is very important for trans-
porting you to that place, a sound mantra like OM i
s helpful, a guided meditation, an open eye meditation
that lets you have a focus on one particular object,
point, or picture or candle can immediately take you to the

still place, focusing on music, or particular elements of
the music can accomplish that stillness. You can chose
one or more of these techniques to get you there.

You could also have a meditation of questions and
answers. It is important to write down the questions that
you wish to ask before you begin, so that there is a flow and a
direction of the meditation process. Have a note pad so that
you can write down the answers that come to you.
Usually it is the first answer that comes to you. Write that
down, even it you do not understand the reference. Write
down everything until it feels complete and then move
on to the next question. The question and answer period
may go on for a few meditation sessions so do not become
discouraged if you don’t get all of the answers immediately.

Also do not judge yourself or call yourself inadequate
if you are not getting the responses that you want.
Mediation takes practice and intention to do it well.
Also one needs to become accustomed to how s/he
receives that information personally.

Ring the bell, to signal the conclusion of your meditation
session, or turn off your alarm when it rings. After the time
is up and your meditation has ended, begin to stretch
and loosen your neck and shoulders, and your back and
perhaps your arms and legs. Breathe big breaths in to
bring you from that deep place. Do not force yourself
beyond your time that you told yourself would be the
amount of time for that day. There are other days to
extend the time.

Meditation takes a lot of practice and time.
There are many mental and physical obstacles to over-
come. The mind is always active and always
condemning. It judges you harshly without cause,
it holds you guilty, it keeps you in a fearful place,
it believes that it is under attack, it says empathically
that you can never change, it is full of resistance
and self loathing. The mind never speaks of
your true nature, which is joy, love, compassion
for all creatures, kindness, deep wisdom,
abundance, and the unlimited free flowing capacity.

It is also helpful to keep a journal of your
spiritual progress and your meditations.
Which techniques work best for you, how often
do you get to a still place, is there anything that
came up that you did not expect, are you
causing yourself stress in a process that is
designed to bring more peace and stillness for
you, are you judging yourself? Can you make
a change to comfort yourself, are you receiving
your answers during a Q & A period.

A Note On Meditation And Breathing.
Breathing can start out big and full and then
gradually become diminished and more silent.
It is part of your focus that leads you to that still
place. When you are meditating you are letting
the mind rest on a new focal point other than a
million thoughts of worry, anxiety, fear and what
you will do in the next moment or the evening.
Remember a funnel, it has a great capacity
coming into the top but it is coming down through
a progressively narrower opening, until it passes
through only a tiny opening. The same actions
are occurring when you are limiting your thoughts
to one or more focal points. Letting go of
distracting thoughts, worry, and fear, and focusing
on less and less until you are at a still place.

Focus: Earlier I told you that there are steps
to get you to that still place, the focal points that
draw your mind into a still and quiet place. One
focus is the present moment, only this moment is
what you are focusing on at this time. Another
focus is the steady breathing coming into your
physical form, or the OM sounds resonating
through your mind and body, still other focuses
include the elements of the music like running
water that you are training your ears to pick out,
or the music itself, in a guided meditation you are
letting images form in your mind and that
becomes a focal point, and in an open eye
meditation you are letting your eyes become trained
on a physical point that you can see, and gradually
you let your mind come to an internal focal point.
All of the focal points are designed to assist you to
get into the resting place of the mind where the
mind becomes secondary. When the mind is
resting and not complaining, condemning or
judging then you become aware of your unlimited
nature, of your gentleness, and divine essence.
It is a place of realization of your TRUE SELF and
in knowing and remember that you become
so comfortable with your expanding and unlimited
nature that you only wish to rest in that place.

My suggestions to you are practice, get relaxed,
get settled, don’t judge, do not compare yourself
to others, allow yourself to learn and progress at
your own pace, encourage yourself, and reassure
yourself when you need to, and keep on
practicing and challenging yourself out of your
comfort zone. Do not listen to the mind’s
condemnation of you. It is only false ramblings.
Reward yourself for your effort. Be good to yourself.
katscoolcorner@yahoo.com 201 970-9340

Yoga Kat-aka Katheryn Hoban is a yoga instructor with twelve years of experience. She teaches children’s yoga ages 3-6,7-12 and adults privately in NJ. She is the Author of the Book DAUGHTER BELOVED which is coming out next year. She has created a children’s affirmation CD (ages 3-6) and an adult affirmation CD. She is available for speaking or writing engagements. Yoga Kat can be reached at katscoolcorner@yahoo.com or 201 970-9340

We all question our ability at times. Uncertainty plagues us. It is even more intense if the ability we are questioning relates to something we have never tried or not succeeded at in the past.

Set backs are common, but we rarely welcome them. We are inclined to respond negatively to adversity. It may be time to revisit that reflexive response.

I had an experience recently that caused me to reconsider whether a negative response to adversity is always justified when I was confronted with a life-threatening situation.

It was mid-morning on a warm and pleasant Saturday. I was in the midst of my first skydive of the day. It was my 2,123th jump since having taken up the sport fifteen years ago.

After about one minute of freefall and 5,000 above the ground, I parted ways with my fellow jumpers to get far enough away from them to open my parachute safely. I initiated opening around 3,000 feet above the earth.

My parachute opened with some twists in the lines between the parachute and me. This is not that uncommon. What was different this time was that I was not able to clear the twists.

The twists in the lines caused my parachute to take on an asymmetrical shape. Receiving asymmetrical inputs, the canopy did what it is designed to do and initiated a turn — that’s how it’s steered. The problem occurred when the turn quickly became a rapid, diving downward spiral that was spinning me a full 360 degrees about once every second. This was a problem.

I looked up to assess my canopy and saw something I don’t often see - the horizon clearly visible ABOVE the trailing edge of my canopy. This meant my canopy and I were now on roughly the same horizontal plane. In that I could see the horizon behind it, I was actually above my parachute and it was leading our fast spinning parade rapidly towards mother earth.

My first need was to acknowledge that I was not going to be able to solve this problem. This is not as easy as it seems. Having successfully completed over 2,100 jumps without having to resort to my second parachute, it was hard for me to believe I had really encountered a problem I could not solve. I had a natural inclination to assume I could fix this problem as I had all those in the past.

Sound familiar? It’s always easy to lapse into denial when confronted with a problem. Until we acknowledge the problem and our possible inability to solve it - or to use the methods we have used in the past - we don’t have a chance of making things better.

Fortunately, the urgency of this situation caused my hard-headed nature to yield much quicker than usual. That decision probably took a second or two.

The next step, having accepted the need to follow a different course than in the past, was to determine the course. Fortunately fifteen years of training and practice before every day of jumping took hold.

I looked straight down at the two handles on either side of my chest - one to release me from my malfunctioning canopy and one for deploying my reserve parachute - and realized I needed to quickly get them in my hands. I could not help but notice when I made eye contact with them, as had been ingrained in me during my First Jump Course way back in 1988, that by now the rapid spins had turned me back to earth and there beyond my toes was once again the horizon. This was bad!

Time was of the essence at this point not only because I was now rapidly progressing toward the horse pasture below me, but also because the centrifugal force I was starting to experience would soon make it impossible to get my hands to those two handles.

With my hands now securely on the handles, I was confronted with a bothersome question, “Now, which one goes first.” The wrong order could cause my reserve parachute to deploy into my spinning main parachute which would result in an incurable entanglement.

Fortunately, ingrained training once again took over and I pulled them in the right order. First the handle on the right side which released me from my spinning main parachute followed by the handle on the left side to deploy my reserve parachute.

This brought on a wonderful experience. My malfunctioning black, teal and magenta canopy was replaced with a bright, yellow never before used reserve parachute. What a lovely sight! And all this by 1,700 feet - plenty of time to spare.

Many years ago, I read a book about the challenges and responsibilities of Secret Service agents. One of the sad aspects of that profession is that agents who never have the chance to validate their years of training by responding to a threat sometimes struggle severely in retirement. They are faced with not knowing - with certainty - how they would respond when faced with the paramount challenge their career can deliver. For this reason, agents who have faced such a challenge successfully are admired within the culture of the Service.

That Saturday morning, I had the privilege of facing a similar, life-threatening and I now realize life-defining challenge. I faced what Secret Service agents call “the dragon.”

For all of us the greater dragon is not the external threat, whether it be an assassin’s bullet, the unforgiving and fast approaching earth or another challenge. The real dragon is the self-doubt we carry within us.

For those few splendid moments after landing safely, I was able to put my foot firmly on the neck of the dragon … and it felt great.

Keep this in mind the next time you are confronted with adversity. On the far side of the experiences the adversity presents, there could be a valuble gift - a renewed confidence and certainty.

(c) 2004, Jim McCormick. All rights in all media reserved.

About The Author

Jim McCormick is an MBA, former corporate Chief Operating Officer, three time skydiving World Record holder and was a member of an international expedition that skydived to the North Pole. More information is available at http://www.TakeRisks.com and 970.577.8700.

Jim@TakeRisks.com

A sharp word or a harsh tone of voice can be devastating to those who are extremely sensitive. I know because I’m one of those sensitive individuals. When someone raises their voice to me I get a tingling sensation at the base of my spine that permeates my whole being. At times I have to fight back the tears. The hurt seems to be deep enough to touch my very soul. I can’t explain why I react the way I do. I only know how I feel. It’s not always easy to explain feelings even for a trained psychologist which I certainly am not.

In my younger years I developed a system to keep from getting hurt. I built a wall around myself and didn’t let anyone inside. In fact, I didn’t let anyone get close at all. The wall still stands although it is no longer quite as high or as strong as it once was. When I felt that someone was going to say something hurtful to me, I would instinctively say something hurtful to them first. It was my way of protecting myself. In my heart, I knew this was wrong but it’s only natural that when we’re hurt we want to hurt back. If we could all practice the art of forgiveness on a regular basis we could virtually eliminate personal conflict and eradicate war. Unfortunately, to be able to fully forgive with one’s whole heart is not quite as easily done as it is to pass the words through our lips.

It wasn’t until many years later that I realized the value and importance of forgiveness. As people enter and exit our lives we don’t often express our true feelings to many of them. We leave things unsaid that fester within us like a wound that becomes infected. We wrestle with guilt that plagues our consciousness but we can heal our inner wounds with the salve of forgiveness. Even if someone has moved on from this life and we cannot directly ask their forgiveness, we can forgive ourselves.

In time I also came to the realization that those who hurt others are in reality hurting themselves. This is a universal law. Nature has its own natural balance that exists in all things. We are taught to forgive because forgiveness is the healing elixir for the festering wound of anger that eats away at us. When Jesus healed people, he told them they were forgiven. When we hurt others we hurt ourselves. When we carry anger or hatred in our hearts we are destroying ourselves. Forgiveness serves the greatest good.

We have to understand that wisdom comes to all in time. There are many reasons why people do and say hurtful things. Sometimes things are done out of straight forward maliciousness; other times they are done out of self-preservation. We allow our own defense mechanism to kick in. We hurt others out of our own insecurities. We have to take a long look inward and realize that our actions not only affect those who they are directed toward but that they return to whence they came. Our actions come back to us and that knowledge alone should be enough to propel us to a more loving, forgiving nature.

I’m still sensitive to harsh tones and rude words but I’m a little more understanding and tolerant than I was in the past. Sure, I still get mad. I’m human and anger is a human emotion but I no longer let the anger fester within me like that growing wound I mentioned before. I acknowledge the fact that I am angry and I evaluate the reason why I am angry. Then I let go of the anger. I forgive the person who made me angry ( that is not always easy) and I forgive myself for my actions and reactions in response to the situation. I have come to understand that everything happens for a reason and there is a lesson to be learned in every situation. If there were never anything or anyone to forgive how would we learn the very valuable lesson of forgiveness?

Darlene Zagata is a freelance writer and author of two books, “Aftertaste: A Collection of Poems” and “The Choosing.” She is also a monthly columnist and editor for the print publication Moon Shadows Magazine. Visit Darlene’s website at http://darlenezagata.tripod.com or contact Darlene at darzagata@yahoo.com

How much time do you waste in comparing yourself with others? Answer to this question is most of time. This is the story of many like you, because you are taught to do this. From the childhood conditioning starts. Parent would like the child to just like them, their carbon copies. They want their child to follow their philosophy, their religion, their ideology; their race and everything belong to them. They want to make the child their vehicle in fulfilling this purpose.

They try to enforce their ambitions on the child and therefore they does not allow child to be him. It is like that a lily flower is told to become like a rose. But they do not know that a rose can not become a lily. From the out side he may pretend to be rose, however inside he is lily. Due to this he will neither be able to become lily nor rose. This creates a real problem for him. The person for the whole remains searching for his true self.

In his state if he tries to fulfill the ambitions of family or society and if he falls short of it then he feels guilty of it. This makes him tense, anxiety ridden and full of anguish. The same energy which he might have used in some creative work is wasted in this anger and anguish. Meditation can help her because meditation simply means undoing what society has done to you. With the help of meditation we can restart our new life.

The mean problem with person is that he does not know himself and tries to be like some thing else. Dropping all goals, dropping all desires, dropping all ambitions can do this. We are requiring being natural. But we are living in bondage, because everybody who brought you up wanted to have mastery over you. And as children we are most helpless and exploited beings. When the child is so helpless he has to accept whatsoever conditions some one puts on him. Just to survive. Putting off all these conditioning can work as second birth to us.

http://thoughts-of-a-ordinary-man.blogspot.com
http://www.geocities.com/arvindkatoch1

http://www.arvindkatoch.rediffmail.com

As a co-active coach, one of the underlying principles that I subscribe to is that everyone has their own answers within. Most of what I do as a coach is to give people the time, space and permission to find these answers (and sometimes I provide a question or two to get things going).

So, outside of a coaching session, how can we learn to access these answers that we all have? One thing that I’m learning is that the answers can’t come to me if my head is always busy figuring things out, working, talking, or reading. If I’m doing those things, I’m actually blocking myself from hearing my own wise answers.

One sure way to get an answer to a question is to ask the question and listen for an answer. We’re all quite well-versed at this practice, “Have you seen my briefcase?”, “What would you like to do for dinner tonight?”, “When is that report due?”.

And what I’ve noticed for myself is that I forget this logic when it comes to listening for my own answers. Rarely do I sit quietly and listen. Rarer still do I actually intentionally *ask* myself a question.

I’m working at increasing my practice of asking and listening for answers from within. Since I’m still a beginner, I thought I’d ask someone with more experience to speak further on this topic with us.

Karen Kofman, who co-led a workshop on “Gratitude” with me in November 2003, has a background in corporate training. She currently gives workshops of a spiritual nature involving inner serenity. Karen practices reiki, aromaptherapy, yoga and meditation.

Linda: What is your definition of meditation?

Karen: Meditation is a process to empty and calm the mind, which results in a sense of peace, serenity and calmness and eventually opening yourself to new insights and a sense of overall well-being.

Linda: How has your life changed since you’ve been practicing meditation regularly?

Karen: Meditation has come into my life very slowly, when I first started I didn’t notice much change, but over time, there have been major spiritual and emotional awakenings. I am more settled, less anxious, have more energy and am less judgmental of those around me.

Linda: What’s the best way for someone to start meditating?

Karen: The first thing I want to make clear is that meditation is not complicated, doesn’t take a lot of time, and can be done by anyone. Most of us have dabbled in meditation by participating in conscious relaxation, perhaps during an exercise class or sport activity.

Here is a meditation exercise you can try for yourself.

Start by paying attention to your breathing. The practical effect of focusing completely on your breathing leads to a sense of calmness, as it takes your mind away from the “clutter” that constantly tries to invade.

Take a few deep breaths to relax your body and mind. Begin to breath again and with each exhalation feel your body relax into a peaceful state. Let go of thoughts, worries. Feel the presence of stillness within you. Feel a softness around your heart.

If thoughts emerge, acknowledge them and go back to your breath. Continue this process for 3-10 minutes to begin and you may increase the time as you feel necessary.

With repeated efforts, the goal of clearing your mind to think of nothing will come more easily. You will have the ability to be clear and open and to welcome spaces for fresh and clean thoughts to emerge. The process of meditation will begin to take on its own energies.

Thanks so much to Karen Kofman for sharing her wisdom with us this month! It’s certainly inspired me to “stop and listen” more often.

(c) Copyright 2005, Genuine Coaching Services.

Linda Dessau, the Self-Care Coach, is the author of “The Everyday Self-Care Workbook”. To receive one of her free monthly newsletters, subscribe at http://www.genuinecoaching.com/newsletter.html